We won't talk about the elephant in the room, just what the evil teams in the North did this week. 

Bears

The Bears embarrassed the Browns, 31-3.

Game Notes

• It's getting harder to talk s about the Bears, and I hate it. The turnover luck and dominant run game continued in this one, and it led to a 4-TD victory. 
• Caleb Williams had another fine day, 17/28 for 242 yards with two TDs. The, perhaps, bigger storyline is that Ryan Poles was apparently correct to say that Luther Burden, second round rookie, is the best receiver on the team. Rome Odunze had some good stat lines before getting hurt, but Burden has taken over as of late. 
• The Packers couldn't stay ahead of the sticks against the Browns months ago because they had no run game to slow the pass rush. That wasn't an issue for the Bears, who had 142 yards on 33 attempts. It was another game where the long carry was less than 20 yards. It's almost more demoralizing to give up mid-run after mid-run than to give up one huge run. 
• Defensively, it all came down to turnovers again and the Bears had no problem producing them against rookie Shedeur Sanders. CJ Gardner-Johnson, D'Marco Johnson and Jaylon Johnson all had picks. The Jaylon Johnson interception was one of the luckiest plays in NFL history. The ball bounced off a Browns' reciever's hands in the end zone and lodged between Johnson's hip and his until Johnson could grab it. I don't know how goats or first-born children or whatever the Bears sacrificed in an arcane blood ritual this off-season but you have to hope the luck wears off by next year. 

Lions

The Lions couldn't keep up with the Rams in a 41-34 loss. 

Game Notes

• When Dan Campbell took over play-calling for the Lions weeks ago, we all thought it meant John Morton was a lame duck offensive coordinator. After another horrific defensive game, where the team gave up 41 points and 519 yards to the Rams, could Kelvin Sheppard be on the hot seat as well? 
• The Stafford-Goff match ups are fun to watch because of the Lions fan dinguses on twitter who think they got the better QB in that trade. Their lines were pretty close outside of a Stafford pick in this one. The Rams won this game because they stopped the Lions run and ran the ball at will against them. 
• Jahmyr Gibbs had another meh show with 17 touches for 58 yards. David Montgomery again averaged more per carry on half the touches. On the other side of the field, Kyren Williams and Blake Corum combined for 26 carries for 149 yards. This whole Lions defense was supposed to be built to stop the run. Bad look for sure. 
• The Sun God and Jameson Williams both showed up in the pass game, combining for 20 catches and 298 yards. Puka and Davante, 13 for 252 yards, may have challenged them if Davante hadn't hurt his hamstring. 

Vikings

The Vikings beat the Cowboys, 34-26.

Game Notes

• JJ McCarthy might be doing enough to cement his status as 2026 starting QB. He threw for 250 yards and 2 TDs to go with just one pick. The Cowboys are bad, but McCarthy looked fine. 
• Also worth noting that he produced without any run game. Aaron Jones and Jordan Mason combined for 63 yards on 22 carries. Bad! 
• The game was just weird. The Cowboys had 100 more yards than the Vikings. Where McCarthy threw a pick and had had over 20% of his yards come on one play, Dak threw no picks and almost 300 yards. The Cowboys went over 100 yards rushing. They just couldn't convert those yards into enough scores. 
• Note: the below tweet has absolutely nothing to do with the game, but I saw it and wanted to share.